"Manhattan is a place where everyone wants to feel special and wants to be the best. We're magnets for perfection, and we want it from everyone around us." [He says this leads to an all-or-nothing way of thinking - if you are not perfect, you're worthless - an outlook that inevitably brings disappointment]. "There's this spiraling down, this fighting against the shame of feeling you're not he best, you're not special."
-- Dr. Richard Pfieffer, Anger Management Specialist, paraphrased by Jennifer Romolini in All the Rage in Time Out New York.

"The Iraqi's are trying to write their constitution. Why? Take ours - we're not using it!"
-- Robin Williams

"It's nice to have a President that confuses his commandments and amendments."
-- Robin Williams

"I'm not pretending I won't be famous any more, but believe me in the modern world if you take yourself out of the financial aspect of things, ie you're not making anybody any money or you're not losing anybody any money, believe me I'll be of very little interest to the press in a certain number of years."
-- George Michael, on announcing his retirement form the commercial music industry.

"Your government failed you. Those entrusted with protecting you failed you. And I failed you."
-- Richard A. Clarke, former counterterrorism chief, as quoted in today's The New York Times.

"When I go home from today's work and I choose, because of my nature, to associate with another man, how is that a problem for you?... How does that hurt you?"
-- Barney Frank, Congressman from Massachusetts, said in testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee yesterday, as quoted in The New York Times.

"The Republican National Committee announced today that the Republican Party is changing its emblem from an elephant to a condom. Governor Marc Racicot, RNC chairman, explained that the condom more clearly reflects the party's stance today, because a condom accepts inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you're getting screwed."
-- An Internet forwarded e-mail

''I'm sure I'll be criticized for lots of things, and I'm sure they'll launch their dogs on me... But, frankly, I find it outrageous that the president is running for reelection on the grounds that he's done such great things about terrorism.''
-- Richard A. Clarke, Counterterrorism Coordinator to Presidents G.H.W. Bush, WJ Clinton and G.W. Bush, in an interview with 60 Minutes.

"If you would be so kind to write such a letter, please include your opinion of my character, my work ethic, my integrity and my probity."
-- Martha Stewart, in a letter to celebrity friends and VIPs requesting that letters be sent to the judge to reduce her sentencing.

"I am glad the prosecutors finally dismissed the child pornography charge without me or the taxpayers having to pay for a costly, circus-like trial . . . These are certainly troubling times when our Attorney General John Ashcroft has actually ordered the semi-nude Spirit of Justice to be covered with drapes . . . [the fine and plea] seemed like the sanest way to make it end."
-- Paul Reubens, AKA Peewee Herman in Page Six, today.

"I feel uncomfortable [about Iraq] due to the fact that we were misled with the information on
weapons of mass destruction."
-- Aleksander Kwasniewski, President of Poland

"We agree that the mayor should have a larger role in
running the school system than in the recent past, but he
should not have unchecked power to hire personnel, make
contracts and set policy. The time has come, then, for a
mid-course correction by the Legislature to restore
transparency, public engagement and accountability to the
school system.


Since the mayoral takeover, the school system has been
reorganized along the lines of a corporate business model,
as though educating children was no different from selling
toothpaste. The Department of Education is today a tightly
centralized, top-down structure of regional and local
officials who relay instructions from the department's
headquarters to the schools. Not only does the
reorganization leave out any role for public involvement,
it has also led to serious malfunctioning of school
services.


The reorganization, for example, caused the disruption of
school discipline and the near collapse of school safety
during the past six months. The department wiped out the
old disciplinary system, leading to long delays in dealing
with suspended students - who were quickly returned to
their schools and got into more trouble. And Mr.
Bloomberg's solution of putting armed police officers into
the schools is not a long-term answer to the deeper
problem, which is the erosion of the authority of teachers
and principals in schools. In addition, the reorganization
left thousands of children who have disabilities without
access to the services they need."

-- Diane Ravitch and Randi Weingarten in an Op-Ed piece titled Public Schools, Minus the Public in The New York Times, today.

"Keep away from small people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great".
-- Mark Twain

"Spain is going to see eye to eye with Europe again."
-- José Zapatero, prime minister-elect of Spain, as quoted by The New York Times.

"There is something on the Internet that made me both laugh and cry and shake my head. It seems there's an online Presidential Prayer Team urging us to pray for George W. Bush as he governs, and as he seeks, among other things, the wisdom to legally codify the definition of marriage. This is a sincere group. But another Internet site, which surely means to be sarcastic, offers the following: They say if the president has his way - to wit, that marriage in the U.S. shall consist of a union between one man and one woman - he will have to consider that biblically it shall also consist of a union between one man and one or more women. (Genesis 29:17-28; II Samuel 3:2-5)... Also, marriage shall not impede a man's right to take concubines in addition to his wife or wives. (II Samuel 5:13;II Chronicles 11:21)... Marriage shall be valid only if the wife is a virgin. If she is not, she shall be executed by stoning. (Deuteronomy 22:13021)... Marriage of a believer and a non-believer shall be forbidden. (Genesis 24:3, Numbers 25: 1-9, Ezra 9:12; Nehemiah 10:30)... Marriage is for life, no state or federal law shall permit divorce. (Deuteronomy 22: 19; Mark 10:9)... If a married man dies childless, his brother shall marry the widow. If he refuses to marry his brother's wife or deliberately does not give her children, he may pay a fine of one shoe and be otherwise punished in a manner determined by law. (Genesis 38: 6-10; Deuteronomy 25:5-10)... There you have it. It's right there in the Bible, as Mel Gibson says."
-- Liz Smith, in today's New York Post.

"Work hard. Eat what they give you. Wear what they hand you. Exercise. And, for once in your life, follow the rules."
-- Andrea Peyser, paraphrasing Leona Helmsley in an article titled Take It from Leona, in today's New York Post.

"This President can't talk about his positive vision for America, because at each turn he has put this nation on the wrong track."
-- John Kerry, March 11, 2004.

"Be wary of what you read on the Internet! A letter purportedly written by Bette Midler to George W. Bush on the subject of gay marriage is all over the Web. The letter begs Bush to rethink his avowed intention to amend the Constitution, [regarding] gay marriage. But The Divine One didn't pen this plea. Friends say that, while Bette agrees with the specifics of the missive, she is not the author."
-- Liz Smith, in yesterday's New York Post

"We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another."
-- Jonathan Swift

"...there was an invisible, gelatinous, repressive air to it all. The scariest kind of censorship is self-censorship—the intimidation that's happening under the established order that we live in."
-- Richard Belzer, regarding the Oscar cerimonies this year, to Michael Musto.

"So, other than Martha Stewart, our only other felons are people who smoke cigarettes or marry gays. Somebody, anybody, please tell me what's with our legal system."
-- Cindy Adams, New York Post

"I'm in favor of legalizing drugs. According to my values system, if people want to kill themselves, they have every right to do so. Most of the harm that comes from drugs is because they are illegal."
-- Milton Friedman

Dear Friends:

"I am obviously distressed by the jury's verdict but I continue to take comfort in knowing that I have the confidence and enduring support of my family and friends.

I will appeal the verdict and continue to fight to clear my name. I believe in the fairness of the judicial system and remain confident that I will ultimately prevail.

I can't tell you how much I appreciate all the words of encouragement I have received from thousands of supporters. It is your continued support that will keep me going until I am completely exonerated.

Sincerely,"

-- Martha Stewart, in an open letter, posted yesterday, on her webpage titled MarthaTalks.

"... the number of dollars you possess is of no importance. There are only three things that matter: loving , laughing, and learning."
-- Sally Brompton

“There is good evidence that how long you sleep seems to be the most important indicator of how long you’ll live”.
William C. Dement with Christopher Vaughan, The Promise Of Sleep

"The best index to a person's character is how he treats people who can't do him any good, and how he treats people who can't fight back."
-- Abigail van Buren

“Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself”.
-- Anonymous

"The first time I hosted the Oscars 13 years ago things were so different in the world. Bush was president. The economy was in the toilet and we had just finished a war in Iraq."
-- Billy Crystal

“Not all those who wander are lost”.
-- J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord Of The Rings: Fellowship Of The Ring

"Joan Rivers is on a manhunt. The clothes-conscious comic recently signed up for jdate.com, the Jewish online dating service. 'I wouldn't give my real name,' Rivers told the Los Angeles Times. 'I just said I was a successful writer. I didn't want to post my picture, so I tried to use a photo of Nicole Kidman with a line through it, but they wouldn't accept it.' Rivers says she's desperate to meet a heterosexual hunk: 'I can't stand another minute with a gay man,' she whined."
-- Page Six, in the New York Post, today.

"I think the actions of the president yesterday, which are, you know, in my opinion, the most vile and hateful words ever spoken by a single president in my opinion. I am stunned, and I am horrified."
-- Rosie O'Donnell, on President's Bush's vow to destroy the instituting of gay marriage.

"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
-- Dan Quayle

"In an effort to improve the image of the pit bull, New York City has officially changed the dog's name to "New Yorkies." I propose that we Crabs try a similar experiment. Isn't it time we try shedding our linguistic connection with the killer disease? How about if for the next three weeks we call our sign "Thunderbird" or "Quantum Flux" or "Vanquisher" instead of "Cancer"? Let's see if it stimulates subtle changes in the way we think about ourselves. It's the perfect time to try it. We're currently in an astrological phase when we have maximum power to transcend limitations."
-- Robert Brezny, Free Will Astrology

"Shaking hands. I think it's a terrible custom. One of the worst. It's been proven you can get colds and flu and everything else. Unfortunately, it's a modern-day necessity. I prefer the Japanese method"
-- Donald Trump. In an interview with Reed Tucker in Time Out New York.

"I don't care what is written about me as long as it isn't true."
-- Katherine Hepburn

"Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who did not hear the music."
-- Angela Monet

"Character is much easier kept than recovered."
-- Thomas Paine

"I just say to the president... Come out and meet with the three-plus thousand couples that have committed themselves to one another, committed to a long-term loving relationship with equal status, the same status that he and his wife are afforded. And recognize the spirit and the pride that comes with that."
-- Mayor Gavin Newsom, the man behind San Francisco's week-old policy allowing same-sex marriages, as quoted in The New York Times.

"You can fool too many people too much of the time."
-- James Thurber

“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself”.
-- George Bernard Shaw

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other."
-- Abraham Lincoln

"Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company. "
-- George Washington

“Dream as though you’ll live for ever; live as though you’ll die today”.
-- James Dean

"Dream on it. Let your mind take you to places you would like to go . . . think about it and plan it and celebrate the possibilities. And don't listen to anyone who doesn't know how to dream. Anything is possible in this world. I really believe that."
-- Liza Minnelli

"This is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way".
-- Doris Lessing

"I think that [Mayor Bloomberg] has decided that he can't improve the schools, so why not try and create the teachers as a scapegoat."
-- Randi Weingarten, President, United Federation of Teachers on the City's offer yesterday of an eight page contract without any of the job protections previously negotiated in good faith by New York City.

"I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves."
-- August Strindberg

"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole".
-- Roger Caras

"In the not-too-distant future, the only people who will want to see the old shows are boomers who spent their youth lip-synching to the original cast recording of "Hello, Dolly!" in the rec room while everybody else was outside playing baseball."
-- Michael Reidel, New York Post

"For those of us who lived through Vietnam, the parallels to the situation in Iraq today are startling. Every day we are beginning to hear about a soldier lost here and a soldier lost there. Ever-mounting civilian deaths. The government estimates a four-year stay. And always, there is the lingering question, 'Now tell me why we went there again?'"
-- Marianne Williamson, Questions About Iraq War Create Moral Outrage, The Detroit News

"Confusion is the beginning of wisdom".
-- Socrates

"If you can't convince them, confuse them."
-- Harry Truman

"George Bush seems as unbeatable as any unbeatable incumbent has ever been... While there are lots of people who would like to believe they can passionately will this not to be true, the main premise of this election is a deep fatalism about the inevitability of George Bush. Nothing short of cataclysm would appear to be able to dislodge him. Such a stoic sense of reality makes the primaries ?the upset in Iowa last week, the attempt to regain footing in New Hampshire this week ?seem something like fantasy baseball and the people out in Iowa and New Hampshire like quaint hobbyists (if not weird cultists)...
The preposterous rise of Howard Dean was the initial reaction to the Bush lock: What do we have to lose? Let?s be bold?. The backlash against Dean, the second: What have we done here? We?re not just going to be creamed, we?re going to be a laughingstock."
-- Michael Wolff, New York Magazine

"I will never engage in a winter sport with an ambulance parked at bottom of the hill."
-- Erma Bombeck

"I can't shut my eyes, I'm afraid of the dark."
-- Steve Taylor

"Most people think I've been in the witness protection program."
-- Jack Paar, 1918-2004, from The New York Times

"Everyone thinks Ed Sullivan discovered the Beatles. That's not true. I had them on before he did. I did it because I thought they were funny, not because I liked the music. I'm a Muzak kind of guy — my home's like living in an elevator."
-- Jack Paar, 1918-2004, from The New York Times

"I stay driven 'cause there's nowhere to park..."
-- Steve Taylor

"Nietzche is dead."
-- God

"God is dead."
-- Nietzche

"Play is the work of children. It's very serious stuff. And if it's properly structured in a developmental program, children can blossom."
-- Bob Keeshan, Captain Kangaroo, 1927-2004

"I made it with my lucky legs, my mother, and a lot of backbreaking hard work."
-- Ann Miller, 1923-2004, as quoted by Playbill

"Why do blessings wear disguises? If I were a blessing, I'd run around naked!"
-- Estelle Getty as Sophia Petrillo on The Golden Girls.

"Where are you going to get the jury pool from, Mars?"
-- Judy Leon, of Bowne DecisionQuest, a litigation advisory firm, regarding Martha Stewart's trial which begins Jury Selection today in Lower Manhattan. In the New York Times.

"Dr. [Martin Luther] King invoked God-given and constitutional rights in defense of extending civil rights to every man. He believed in his country's distinct ability to maintain a steadfast commitment to its values even when institutional realities pointed in other directions. Dr. King personified the American creed. That it was Ronald Reagan who bestowed on Dr. King the honor of a national holiday should no longer come as a surprise."
-- Kiron K. Skinner, assistant professor of history and political science at Carnegie Mellon University, and member of the Defense Policy Board, in The New York Times.

"If you obey all the rules... you miss all the fun."
-- Katharine Hepburn

"The sad thing about puppetry is that people think it's just for kids. They bring along their infants and toddlers nowadays so that the puppeteer will jiggle their dollies. It's frustrating as an artist and has caused many people to flee the profession."
-- Unknown, from Puppetry and Links.

"I work at the Palace Ballroom,
But gee, that Palace is cheap.
When I get back to my chilly apartment
I'm much too tired to sleep.

I'm one of those lady teachers,
A beautiful hostess, you know.
The kind the Palace features
At exactly a dime a throw.

Ten cents a dance,
That's what they pay me,
Gosh, how they wear me down!
Ten cents a dance,
Pansies and rough guys,
Tough guys who tear my gown.

Seven to midnight I hear drums,
Loudly the saxophone blows,
Trumpets are breaking my eardrums,
Customers crush my toes.

Sometimes I think I've found my hero,
But it's a queer old man.
All that you need is a ticket:
Come on, Big Boy, ten cents a dance!

Fighters and sailors and bowlegged tailors
Can pay for a ticket and rent me!
Butchers and barbers and rats from the harbor
And sweethearts my good luck has sent me!

Though I've a chorus of elderly beaus,
Stockings are porous with holes in the toes!
I'm dead at closing time!
Dance, sounding merry, it's only a dime!

(Refrain)"

-- Lorenz Hart, Lyricist, Ten Cents A Dance as sung by Ruth Etting, in 1930.

"The Buddha could accomplish the enlightened mind because its very nature was already there. That is why buddhahood—enlightenment—is possible. If there were no no such nature or potential, it would be impossible".
-- Dalai Lama, Imagine All The People, from the book Daily Wisdom: 365 Buddhist Inspirations, as quoted on Human Bacon.

"Deterioration is offset by a deeper sense of gratitude"
-- Diane Keaton, on the subject of aging

"Santorum: Pronunciation: san-TOR-um
Function: noun
Etymology: Savage Love - 05/29/03
1. The frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex."
-- Dan Savage, of Savage Love

"In a relationship, there can be a lot of fun in fantasy. You can play the strong one or the little boy or the manly man who grabs a chick by the hair and drags her to the bedroom. I've always been such a strong kind of guy, I like playing the innocent more often."
-- Patrick Swayze, telling reporter Andrew Goldman in Elle, as quoted by Liz Smith today.

"We don't know a millionth of one percent about anything."
-- Thomas Edison

"If I had my life to live over again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner."
-- Tallulah Bankhead

"Come off it, Martha!"
Paul Lynde, The Paul Lynde Show

"Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time."
-- Sir John Lubbock

"If you want to see my penis, you’ll have to fly to Britain... It does amuse me, the horrific violence that comes out of American cinema. But someone's cock is too much... If I'd blown away 5,000 people with a semiautomatic machine gun, that would be fine. But I showed my penis."
-- Ewan McGregor, on his disappointment with Sony Classics on editing out a scene that showed full frontal nudity from the U.S. release of Young Adam, in Premiere Magazine. (Interested readers should know that McGregor's penis is also on display in Trainspotting and Velvet Goldmine.) As quoted on Cinema Eye.

If blindness is a limitation,
it is so in quite the same way
as innumerable other characteristics
to which human flesh is heir
-- Kenneth Jernigan, Blindness: Handicap or Characteristic

"Be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Talk health,
happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet. Make all your friends
feel there is something in them. Look at the sunny side of everything. Think
only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best. Be as
enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your won. Forget
the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the
future. Give everyone a smile. Spend so much time improving yourself that
you have no time left to criticize others. Be too big for worry and too
noble for anger."
-- Christian D. Larson, Creed for Optimists

"I think George Bush is going to win in a walk... I really believe I'm hearing from the Lord it's going to be like a blowout election in 2004. It's shaping up that way.... "The Lord has just blessed him... I mean, he could make terrible mistakes and comes out of it. It doesn't make any difference what he does, good or bad, God picks him up because he's a man of prayer and God's blessing him."
-- Pat Robertson on the 700 Club.

"Maybe Pat got a message from Karl Rove and thought it was from God."
-- Rev. Barry W. Lynn, Americans United for Separation of Church and State.

"You have the possibility of playing two different roles that many people imagine are incompatible. Who cares what they think? You can definitely go both ways without being either a contradiction or a fake."
-- Robert Brezny, Real Astrology

"...I invite you to do the following ritual to mark this date in history and powerfully choose to give up the old for the new. Begin by making a list of all that you are willing to let go of. Write down all the thoughts, behaviors, excuses, fears or justifications that have stopped you in the past. Then look over that list and see how all of it has served you. Be willing to receive the gifts of your past actions, for hidden within them is vital wisdom that can be used as fuel to propel you toward the future you desire. After you have extracted these lessons and blessed all that is on your list, find a way to dispose of it. You can burn it (but make sure you do it in a very safe way), bury it, tear it up, or wrap it in some nice paper and throw it away."
-- Debbie Ford

"Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind?/ Should auld acquaintance be forgot/And auld lang syne. For auld lang syne, my dear, for auld lang syne/We'll take a cup of kindness yet, for auld lang syne. We two have run about the braes, And put the gowans fine/But we've wandered many a weary foot, Since auld lang syne.
We two have paddled in the burn/From morning sun till dine/But seas between us braid have roared, Since auld lang syne. And there's a hand, my trusty friend/And gives a hand o thine/And we'll take a right guide-willie waught/For auld lang syne. And surely you'll be your pint-stowp/And surely I'll be mine/And we'll take a cup of kindness yet/For auld lang syne."
-- Robert Burns

"Help me to be aware of the many blessings which are mine. Often we chase what we think we desire and in so doing miss what You are trying to give us."
-- Renaissance Unity, a meditation.

"Just do your job, plus a little bit more"
-- George W. Stockman, on how to succeed with an employer for a long range career without ever elevating their expections by your overachieving.

"The tourists are back... For the last few weeks, they have packed the streets of Midtown Manhattan like a motley invading army, tilting their heads back to gaze at the skyscrapers and filling the air with a broken music of French and Bengali, Slovak and Texan... Official statistics are hard to come by. But for the last week, more than 1,000 tourists a day have been dropping by NYC & Company's Visitor Information Center, a level not reached since before Sept. 11, 2001, a spokeswoman said... 'We have been seeing the numbers we used to see,' she added. 'It's like a new beginning.'
-- Robert F. Worth, The Tourists Are Back in New York, in Case You Haven't Noticed
The New York Times

"Believe it or not, it may be helping us because it's driving people to drink."
-- Matthew Maher, owner of McSorley's Old Ale House, on New York's ban on smoking, as quoted by The New York Times.

"The great lesson from the true mystics is that the sacred is in the ordinary, that it is to be found in one's daily life, in one's neighbors, friends, and family, in one's back yard." So said psychologist Abraham Maslow. Of course that's always true, but in 2004 it will be far more true for you than ever before. You won't have to travel to exotic paradises to drum up life-changing epiphanies, Cancerian. You won't have to hunt for miracles in all-night revels at the edge of reality. All the amazement you'll need will glide right up to you while you're washing dishes or taking a walk or buying peanut butter."
-- Rob Brezny, Real Astrology

"Joy comes not through possession or ownership, but through a wise and loving heart... "
-- Buddha

"We have to take pleasure seriously."
-- Charles Eames

"Before the beginning, after the great war between heaven and hell, God created the earth and gave dominion over it to the crafty ape he called man. And to each generation was born a creature of light and a creature of darkness.
And great armies clashed by night in the ancient war between good and evil. There was magic then, nobility, and unimaginable cruelty. And so it was until the day that a false sun exploded over Trinity. And man forever traded away wonder for reason."
-- Michael J. Anderson as Samson in Carnivale.

"He's a good boy... I raised him good, and so I'm not too worried about other things that's happened."
-- Joe Jackson, on his son, Michael Jackson

"New York has the lowest overall crime rate among cities with more than one million people, according to their presentation of the preliminary Uniform Crime Report compiled by the Federal Bureau of Investigation for the first half of the year.

Crime dropped 7.4 percent in New York City, the statistics show, compared with 3.1 percent in the nation as a whole, and 4.4 percent in cities with a population greater than a million. The murder rate was up slightly in New York, as it was nationwide, but the city's rate was still far below its peak in 1990.

The city's crime index, a figure adjusted for population, is on par with much smaller cities, like Ann Arbor, Mich., and ranks 194th out of 200 cities with more than 100,000 residents, making it one of the safest."
-- Shaila K. Dewan, The New York Times

"He was just caught like a rat."
-- U.S. Maj. Gen. Ray Odierno on the capture of Saddam Hussein, at a news conference in Tikrit.

"I'd like to thank all of you heteerosexuals... it takes two of you to make one of me."
-- Boy George

"The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do."
-- Walter Bagehot

"Good to begin well. Better to end well."
-- Fortune Cookie

"Only the shallow know themselves."
-- Oscar Wilde

"What happened is that when I was in Afghanistan and Iraq, speaking with a lot of our soldiers, who I think are doing an extraordinary job under dangerous and difficult circumstances, they asked me on one particular occasion, `Well, you know, what do people think of us and what we're doing back home?'... I'm not going to lie to an American soldier, particularly a soldier in the 10th Mountain Division from Fort Drum, New York... And what I said is: `I think you have universal support among the American people. They cannot be prouder of you. And there are questions being raised about the administration's policies.' "
-- Hillary Rodham Clinton

"I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty."
-- John Waters