Most people think life sucks, and then you die. Not me. I beg to differ. I think life sucks, then you get cancer, then your dog dies, your wife leaves you, the cancer goes into remission, you get a new dog, you get remarried, you owe ten million dollars in medical bills but you work hard for thirty-five years and you pay it back and then -- one day -- you have a massive stroke, your whole right side is paralyzed, you have to limp along the streets and speak out of the left side of your mouth and drool but you go into rehabilitation and regain the power to walk and the power to talk and then -- one day -- you step off a curb at Sixty-seventh Street, and BANG you get hit by a city bus and then you die. Maybe.
-- Denis Leary

"Art washes from the soul the dust of everyday life."
-- Pablo Picasso

"In between goals is a thing called life, that has to be lived and enjoyed".
-- Sid Caesar

"Life is very interesting if you make mistakes."
-- Georges Carpentier

"Things to Do Today: See List of Things to Do Yesterday"
-- Pat Fowler, post-it note in her kitchen

"Never put off until tomorrow what you can put off until the day after tomorrow.
-- Milton Berle

"The key to managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided."
-- Casey Stengel

"A career is a job that has gone on too long."
-- Jeff Macnelly

"It's the job that's never started that takes the longest to finish."
-- J.R.R. Tolkien

"Optimism and humor are the grease and glue of life. Without both of them we would never have survived our captivity."
-- Philip Butler

"Life is one long process of getting tired."
-- Samuel Butler

"Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can.
-- Danny Kaye

"Isn't this an unusual conversation for men who aren't crazy?"
-- Larry Contratti quoting Renfield (played by Dwight Frye) in Dracula, Universal Studios, 1931

"I am an optimist. It does not seem too much use being anything else."
-- Winston Churchill

"Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down."
-- Wilson Mizner

"Always do right. It will gratify some and astonish the rest."
-- Mark Twain

"Life is just a bowl of pork chops."
-- Don Cummings quoting from the ad campaign of the National Pork Board, Des Moines

'I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead."
-- Samuel Goldwyn

"The chief danger in life is that you may take too may precautions."
-- Alfred Adler

"All animals except man know that the ultimate of life is to enjoy it."
-- Samuel Butler

"It's easier to ride the horse in the direction it's going"
-- Werner Erhard

"My dear sir, the bigger the humbug, the better the people will like it."
-- Phineas T. Barnum

"I laugh to keep from weeping..."
-- Nicolas Coppola

"Attack life, it's going to kill you anyway."
-- Steven Coallier

"Order is for idiots, genius can handle chaos."
-- Unknown

"The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well."
-- Joe Ancis

"The day begins the night before..."
-- Shari Lewis

Following are from The Wizard of Oz, MGM, 1939

"You have no power here! Begone with you!"
-- Glinda

"Come along Dorothy.....we don't want any of those apples."
-- ScareCrow

"If you don't like my apples, Dont shake my tree!"
-- Apple Tree

"Are you hinting my apples aren't what they ought to be?"
-- Apple Tree

"Some people without brains do an awful lot of talking."
-- ScareCrow

"My! People have a way of coming and going so quickly here!"
-- Dorothy

"You people should consider yourselves lucky that I'm granting you an audience tomorrow instead of 20 years from now."
-- The Wizard

"Can you even dye my eyes to match my gown?"
-- Dorothy

"Who ever thought a little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness?"
-- Wicked Witch

"We take any situation that we are in - it could be a relationship; it could be a family or it could be a work place. And, we recognize that our purpose for being in the situation is that we might be used by God to work miracles."
-- Marianne Williamson from her lecture of 02/10/02, Community - A Joining Of Spirit

"Methinks I see in my mind a noble and puissant nation rousing herself like a strong man after sleep, and shaking her invincible locks."
-- Milton

"The puppets are not enough! I don't want to spend my life crawling along the back roads of every second-rate country in Europe making dolls dance!... I've got to find a reason for living on this earth! Something to want, something to be...somehow to say...I am me!
-- Paul Berthalet (played by Brian Stokes Mitchell), Carnival (Feb. 10, 2002, City Center Encores!, NY)

"I remember cleaning the toilets at the theatre when I worked for Bil Baird's Marionettes in NYC back in the '70's. I couldn't have been happier or prouder that I was actually working with Bil Baird. I still clean toilets and enjoy it."
-- Allyn Gooen

"Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake:
eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg and howlet's wing,
for a charm of pow'rful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble."
-- Second Witch, "Macbeth," IV: 1 by William Shakespeare

"Age is not important unless you're a cheese."
-- Helen Hayes

"Cute little fellow. Good piece of wood, too!"
-- Jiminy Cricket (played by Cliff Edwards), in Pinocchio (1940 Walt Disney Prod.)

"Now remember, Pinocchio: Be a good boy... and always let your conscience be your guide."
-- The Blue Fairy (played by Evelyn Venable) in Pinocchio (1940 Walt Disney Prod.)

"I've got no strings
So I have fun
I'm not tied up to anyone
They've got strings
But you can see
There are no strings on me..."
-- Pinocchio (played by Dickie Jones) in Pinocchio (1940 Walt Disney Prod)

"Yeah, yeah - sure, sure; Screwball in da corner pocket!"
-- Lampwick (played by Frankie Darro) in Pinocchio (1940 Walt Disney Prod.)

"Imagination is more important than knowledge."
-- Albert Einstein

"Do you ever get the feeling that there's something going on that we don't know about?"
-- Timothy Fenwick, Jr. (played by Kevin Bacon.), MGM, Diner, 1982.

"Dance like no one is watching, Love like you'll never be hurt, Sing like no one is listening, Live like it's heaven on earth."
-- William Purkey

"Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths pure theatre."
-- Gail Godwin

"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."
-- Mark Twain

"Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence."
-- Robert Frost

"The spiritual path, then, is simply the journey of living our lives. Everyone is on a spiritual path; most people just don’t know it."
--Marianne Williamson Return to Love